The Crayon That Did Not Work – Learning To Understand Your Child
Crayons are such an amazing invention! Amazing because a set of crayons and a book of yet-to-be-colored pictures will keep my daughter’s attention for extended amounts of time. Needless to say, my daughter loves to color. However, she has gotten a bit frustrated lately with a particular crayon…a crayon that just does not work.
The other day I heard the voice of my confused two-year-old daughter exclaiming, “Daddy, the crayon doesn’t work!” She desperately wanted me to fix it; so, she held the crayon out to me with great expectation. I examined it. Everything seemed to be in perfect working order. I mean, it is a stick of wax – what can really go wrong with it. I told her that it did work and proceeded to show her as much.
She was still confused. The colored stick of wax still didn’t do what she wanted it to do…
Dad Didn’t Know I Was Watching
Today I have the privilege of guest posting for KC over at SomeWiseGuy.com. KC’s blog is all about life and leadership for dangerous dads and manly men. So, I thought I would share a story about my dangerous and manly dad…and some things that I have learned about being a dad (parent) from watching my dad.
Here is an excerpt from the post. Be sure to check out the complete story on SomeWiseGuy.
I watched my dad a lot while I was growing up. I know, we all watched our parents, didn’t we? Sometimes my dad knew I was watching and sometimes he did not…like the time that he apparently gained clearance from the FAA to perform as a low-flying aircraft.
When I was in 7th grade, my dad took me on a camping trip with our boy scout troop. We pitched a tent. We hiked. We chopped firewood. We built a campfire. We cooked food over the campfire (including smores). It rained. We had fun. And we had to leave early so that I could be back home in time for a soccer game.
We were supposed to leave really early Saturday morning. However, we overslept. We hurried to get things settled and into the car. We left late; really late. And, as my custom was, I sacked out while my dad drove.
Now for the low-flying aircraft part…
Click here to check out the rest of the story and to learn the Four Roles Children Need From Their Dad. You may even want to leave a comment and engage the conversation while you are there.
Photo Credit: Remco Donselaar
I Never Knew My Dad Was A Lion Tamer
My dad has always been a hero to me. I have always seen him as a man to respect, a man of authority and a man to fear (fear in a good way). But, I never knew that he was a lion tamer!
Several years ago, my dad was introduced to a group of young boys as a lion tamer. Pretty exciting, huh? I think there was some mention of the chair and whip that he used and the narrow escapes from certain death. The young boys were captivated. They hung on every word and wanted to hear every detail.
Interesting side note, though, is that my dad has never stepped foot into a cage with a lion (like a circus hero), into a den of lions (like a favorite biblical hero) or into a pit with a lion on a snowy day (like some other biblical hero).
My dad has done many things in his life, and 4-legged beasts have never been a match for him (he was a dog-whisperer before there ever was The Dog Whisperer). But, I have never known him to be in the circus or even to have gone on an African safari. Needless to say, I was a bit surprised at this new twist. read more
What To Do When Your Child’s Feelings Are Broken
Recently, one of my young sons got into a bit of an argument with some other kids. Afterwards, I could tell he was upset. But, this was not the normal upset. I have seen my son get angry in these situations and then respond in that anger. This time, though, was a bit different.
Like the good father that I am (or, at least, want to be), I tried to talk with my son. Initially, he did not say much to me. However, as I watched him and his reactions to the unfortunate incident, I recognized a look of sadness.
After some time, my son was my son finally spoke a bit with me and used some words that I had not heard him use before. Instead of words about how mean the other kids had been or what he wanted to do to get even with them, he said to me, “Dad, my feelings are broken.” read more
When You Thought I Wasn’t Looking
Do you ever feel like your children are oblivious to the hours and effort you spend doing everything in the world for them? I do.
I know that my kids do watch me. In fact, I often-times think I am training parrots as my kids mimic everything they see and hear. And I quite often think I am looking at a mirror when I see how my children reflect attitudes, mannerisms, words and actions.
But, sometimes, it seems like my children just don’t notice, understand or appreciate read more
I Didn’t Know Raising Children Meant Training Parrots
Before I had children, I had grand ideas of what I would teach my children, how they would respond, and the blissful life that we would have together. However, there are three things that I forgot to take into account.
First, I don’t know everything that my kids need to know and that I need to teach them. Second, I know (e.g. say and do) way too many things that I don’t want my kids to know (e.g. say and do). And third, I didn’t know raising children meant training parrots! I didn’t know that they would repeat everything I say and do.
Raising Parrots
It all starts out simply enough. In fact, it is usually really cute (is ‘cute’ okay for a guy to say?). Think about a baby mimicking a smile or a toddler repeating a funny sound, word or phrase. read more
Bad-Dream-Away-Inators
Can you still hear it? That little sobbing whimper, that blood-curdling scream, or that shaky little voice saying “I had a bad dream”? In response to your child, you either hug your child with compassion, leap to your feet to battle whatever the enemy might be, or groan because it is the third time…that night.
My wife and I have definitely experienced the bad-dream-dilemma with our kids – with each stage and each child bringing their own challenges.
We all have bad dreams. Even as adults. But, what do we do about them? I have a couple of standard things that I do. And, my wife gave one of the most incredible solutions a few nights ago. I will tell you about all three. read more
Stop Squashing Your Child’s Initiative
A few days ago I encountered one of those times with my kids where I found myself saying “wait just a minute; stop what you are doing; you didn’t ask permission to do that.” This is a fairly normal series of statements for parents. However, in this case, this was not the right response. There was something more important going on that I needed to pay attention to.
What was going on, you ask? Initiative. My son was taking some initiative and doing something that he knew needed to be done – something I had not told him to do. In this case, it was something that he was totally capable of doing and it was a way that he could help the family. I am sure that my response made him feel like the egg in this picture…
After my initial reaction, I realized…finally…that I needed to STOP SQUASHING my son’s INITIATIVE.
I have really been challenged by Seth Godin’s book “Poke the Box”. Definitely on a personal level; but, also on a parental level. Throughout the book, Seth challenges our perspective on taking initiative and rails on the fact that we have created a culture that suppresses our desire to take initiative and do something new.
So, I have to ask myself: What would happen if read more
A Kiss Makes Everything Better
My two-year-old daughter is a very active little girl. She loves to do everything that her big brothers do. And, sometimes, in all of her activity she does something to get hurt. Ok, often times she does something to get hurt. Fortunately, it tends to be little hurts.
This morning my daughter decided to jump rope in imitation of a brother. Of course, she can’t jump rope; at least she can’t jump rope the way you or I would jump rope. Instead, it was more of jumping up and down wildly while holding a flopping plastic rope in front of her. A site to bring a smile to your face for sure.
Eventually the rope smacked her and brought the tears. She came running for the comfort of a parent. A simple look at the ouchy was not enough. A re-assuring word was not enough.
A kiss was demanded! read more
Why Parents Should Stop Saying “Sorry”
When was the last time that you said “I’m sorry” to your child? Did you use the phrase in an attempt to shrug off or down-play an issue; or, did you truly describe something you were apologetic towards with an attempt to make the issue right?
As parents, we are very interested in how our kids make apologies and how they use the word “sorry”. But, do we apply the same standards and desires to our own use of the word?
I know that I am not perfect. And, I admit, there are times when I use a quick and insincere “sorry” to escape the situation. The embarrassing part is when my children observe my antics knowing that I am doing what I have told them not to. The sad part is when I do this to the detriment of my children.
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- The Crayon That Did Not Work – Learning To Understand Your Child
- Dad Didn’t Know I Was Watching
- I Never Knew My Dad Was A Lion Tamer
- What To Do When Your Child’s Feelings Are Broken
- How To Keep Your Attitude From Erupting Into A Bad Attitude